06/30/2020: spider’s dilemma

There is a strong analogy that can be made, for a spider’s web and depression.

Everyday you prepare this web, this craft you’ve picked up as second nature: it’s a part of you. Others might observe your web, call it a spectacle or even call it art. When in reality this web serves a purpose to you; it keeps you alive.

Like the spider’s, it’s fragile but terse too. However, at the start or end of each day, you’ll have to repair it, where it couldn’t quite hold, or start a new one completely.

I don’t think this should discourage you from putting up your web, whether it be painting, writing, singing, dancing, whatever, just as the spider doesn’t when it too starts a new web.

06/29/2020: a new start

I can easily say that I look back on myself, and even my loved ones, with an immense amount of pity. I mean, just thinking about the difficulties of life makes you sort of want to curb all existential thoughts. How brave our pasts selfs were to traverse life’s perils and come out where we are now.

Every moment we thought we could no longer take it, has brought us here today. Yet, and but so, we are still alive— we are still engaged in these feelings.

Think for a moment how hard it was for younger you to survive in the environment it was given.

Maybe we should forgive ourselves because the hand we were dealt then wasn’t as good as what we have now. It’s easy to judge when there is little at stake.

Life is something breath-taking and incredible but that’s only when you’re able to assess the situation.

I wonder if in the near future, or distant, i’ll stumble upon this again; and hopefully i’ll reassure myself that I did all I could and that I’m proud of who I became.

With each sunrise, is another opportunity to forgive someone, even if that someone is you.